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Smitten

Romantic Obsession, the Neuroscience of Limerence, and How to Make Love Last

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Smitten

By: Dr Tom Bellamy
Narrated by: John Hopkins
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Summary

Butterflies in the stomach, intrusive thoughts, fantasies about imaginary scenarios, mood swings from euphoria to despair … aren’t these all the familiar hallmarks of new love? Not quite. These are characteristics of the psychological state of limerence, an intense longing for someone, also known as obsessive, passionate or addictive love that can become unhealthy.

Millions of people will experience limerence at some point in their life, and in this audiobook, Dr Tom Bellamy explores advances in neuroscience since the term was coined in the 1970s to shed light on this little-understood element of the human experience.

Discover:

– what drives limerence

– how to recognise limerence in yourself and others

– how to manage the phases of addiction to another person

– how to move past it to sustain longer, more fulfilling relationships

With supportive advice about next steps, this audiobook will help listeners struggling with unwanted feelings to find emotional equilibrium.

©2025 Dr Tom Bellamy (P)2025 Bolinda Publishing Emotions Human Sexuality Love, Dating & Attraction Personal Development Psychology Psychology & Mental Health Relationships
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This book has truly changed my life, and the way I understand myself. If you struggle with longing, infatuation and obsession, which can make you ecstatic and also miserable, this book will help you understand what's going on in your mind and body. It's spooky how much the descriptions of limerence in the book resonate with my own very personal experiences over many years. If you're realising you might be limerent, this book will be a revelation to you and will help you to understand, be kind to yourself, and help you get perspective. A great read, well written and accessible to non-academics, while including serious neuroscience and research, and relateable experiences from other people, this is a comprehensive guide to understanding what limerence is, how it starts and progresses, and how to try to come out of it. I have listened to it 3 times and am still absorbing the lessons and marvelling at how much it reflects my experiences and inner world. I cannot recommend this book highly enough.

If you live with longing, this book is a life changing path to self discovery

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Having recently discovered that I am a limerent, this book provided insight and helpful strategies for overcoming the issue and moving forward with purpose. It is written with humour and compassion. A must read for any limerent or partner of one. Highly reccommended.

Insightful and helpful guide for limerents

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I read this along with Tennov's "love and limerance" and it was a good companion to that book. This book to help me define and give shape, weight and substance to an otherwise nebulous opponent. It put something that was beyond my understanding, within my understanding and armed me against it.

a useful tool and companion

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My life would have been different if I had known that I'm not alone.
Still nice to learn it now.
And John Hopkin's voice is my new LO.
Result!

I wish I had read this fourty years ago

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Dr Tom writes not only an incredibly helpful book, but one so well writer that it keeps you interested until the last word!

Must listen

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