The Cost of Quiet
How to Have the Hard Conversations That Create Secure, Lasting Love
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3 Months Free + £10 Audible voucher
£5.99/mo after 3 months. Cancel monthly.
Offer ends on 5 July 2026 at 11:59 BST.
The Cost of Quiet
Narrated by:
Colette Jane Fehr LMFT LMHC
Buy Now for £14.05
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Narrated by:
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Colette Jane Fehr LMFT LMHC
“I wish I had spoken up sooner."
People think relationships fail because of deal breakers like infidelity, finances, or parenting problems. But the real culprit is often much less dramatic: emotional disconnection after years of staying silent and avoiding conflict. We’re afraid to say what we need because we worry about what will come next.
Avoidant behavior—the need to “keep the peace” rather than dealing with conflict head on—isn’t our fault. Our ingrained attachment wiring urges us to sidestep day-to-day disputes and brush lingering problems under the rug. But silence is a losing proposition in the long term, leading us to self-abandon and essentially “quiet quit” our relationships.
We can make another choice. In The Cost of Quiet, licensed marriage and family therapist Colette Jane Fehr shines a light on the epidemic of avoidant behavior and how to overcome it. Drawing from the latest attachment science and evidence-based therapies she’s used to repair the bond between hundreds of couples, Fehr gives us the tools to approach those we love with openness, honesty, and vulnerability. The ultimate goal: a securely attached relationship that engages with conflict productively, and the confidence that comes from speaking up and being heard—because a good relationship is worth fighting for.
* This audiobook edition includes a downloadable PDF of visual references.
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