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The Joy of Saying No

A Simple Plan to Stop People Pleasing, Reclaim Boundaries, and Say Yes to the Life You Want

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The Joy of Saying No

By: Natalie Lue
Narrated by: Natalie Lue
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About this listen

Read by the author.

Are you still playing a role you learned in childhood to please others, such as the Good Girl/Boy, the Overachiever, or the Helper? Though these kinds of roles may have gained us attention and affection, they prohibited us from becoming our true selves.

People-pleasing--putting others ahead of ourselves to avoid something negative or to get something we want or need--runs rampant in our society. Saying yes when we should say no leaves us stuck in frustrating patterns. And when we don’t say yes authentically, we say it resentfully, which leads to more problems than if we'd said no in the first place.

The Joy of Saying No will help you identify your people-pleasing style and habits. A six-step framework then teaches you how to discover the healing and transformative power of no to

  • establish healthier boundaries,
  • foster more intimate relationships and fulfilling experiences, and
  • reconnect with your values and authentic self.
 Anxiety Disorders Communication & Social Skills Mental Health Personal Development Personal Success Post-Traumatic Stress Disorders Psychology & Mental Health Relationships

Critic reviews

'Nat's book is the first place I recommend anyone going if they were to take back control of their life. Through simple tools, straightforward talking and compelling storytelling, Nat has created a boundaries bible.'
'Natalie Lue is a leading voice on healthy boundaries. This is a beautiful, compassionate resource. Highly recommend it to you.'
'With her unrivalled insight into the ways of people pleasing, Natalie Lue nails the reasons why we continually say yes and gives us permission not to. Enjoy the joy of saying NO, relieved of guilt or obligation. Freedom awaits.'
All stars
Most relevant
I listened to this audiobook in one day.
There were times I cried because it described how I was as a person and the trauma I had been carrying so vividly.
I want to go over the exercises again to make sure that I become a recovering people pleaser!

Clever and incisive book that helps you to truly see yourself

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Excellent resource for codependents and people pleasers. written in a super accessible and relatable way. I like the way the author reads the audio book as it felt entertaining and personable. I'm gonna purchase the paperback also, so I have a quick reference for those sticky people pleasing moments when I need to say no!

Excellent book

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I recently came across Natalie Lue via Blinkist and the shortcasts of her Baggage Reclaim podcast.

I’ve adored this book. It has made me rather squirmy at times as her descriptions ring a little too true but it had been incredibly helpful on my own path to recovering from people pleasing.

Wish I had this book to read 25 years ago…

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This was a great read that has helped me to understand not only why I was a people pleaser but also to acknowledge there are different types of being a people pleaser. The book takes you on a journey with some great personal examples from the author. I have put some of the recommendations into practice and said no. It’s quite liberating .

It’s liberating saying no

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I've always struggled to say no at the detriment of myself. Natalie affirming that saying no is okay has brought a light I needed to experience.

It was an excellent read.

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