There’s something that doesn’t quite add up in counselling...

We’re trained to be a blank slate…

and yet we’re also trying to build connection, trust, and a sense that someone feels understood before they even reach out.

So where’s the line?

In this episode, I’m joined by Rainbow Tomes, a counsellor, coach and trainer who describes themselves as a ‘mum on a mission’.

Their work is shaped by lived experience, a strong sense of purpose, and a drive to challenge the systems that don’t always support people in the way they should.

This is a really honest conversation about personal disclosure, visibility, and what it means to be ‘human’ in this work… without losing sight of boundaries.

So if you’ve ever found yourself wondering how much of yourself to share, this one will give you plenty to think about.

The tension between being a ‘blank slate’ and building real connection

What personal disclosure actually looks like in practice

The difference between what you share in a session and in your marketing

Why the therapeutic relationship can’t be one-sided

Stepping into visibility (even when it feels uncomfortable)

Systemic harm, grief, and why naming things matters

Rainbow specialises in disenfranchised grief and loss, supporting experiences that are often unseen, unacknowledged, and too often not talked about.

She is the host of the Talking Grief podcast, where she explores these types of conversations in more depth

She is also the founder of The Mental Health People Ltd.

She trains and coaches leaders in more relational, human-centred approaches to mental health and performance. Her work is grounded in a humanistic, integrative approach, incorporating Internal Family Systems (IFS).

Alongside this, she runs a private practice, Rise with Rainbow.

Connect with her on LinkedIn

Start here - my free and paid resources (free resources)