I was adopted at birth by two loving parents, and I had a beautiful childhood. But everything changed when I was bullied in middle school and started eating to cope. While my mother wanted to talk about feelings, my father would take me out to dinner, and food became my emotional anchor. I didn't notice the weight creeping on; it felt like I just woke up one day overweight. I even had medical conditions requiring me to avoid certain foods, but I couldn't stop eating them, no matter how hard I tried.

High school brought some improvement through sports and socializing, but I also tried dangerous diet pills that sent me to the emergency room. I first heard about Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) at 15, but I didn’t want anything to do with it until I hit my top weight of 185 pounds at 22 years old. I was so desperate and knew I needed help.

My addiction went beyond food. I stole, cheated, and accumulated debt, all of which I believe were connected to being an addict. FA and the Twelve Steps changed everything. I became employable and got out of debt. FA supported me through pregnancies, postpartum challenges, cancer, surgeries, and the pandemic – all while staying abstinent.

Today, I am a working artist, married, and raising two children, living an incredible life. I identify as gender-queer, and FA gave me the tools to show up fully as myself – authentic, confident, and free. I cook healthy food for my family, care for my body and mind, and embrace each day with joy, balance, and connection. I came to FA to change my relationship with food, but what I truly gained is the most extraordinary gift: the freedom to be exactly who I am.

Essen ist auch eine Droge Ich bin Mitglied bei Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) und lebe mit einer Mehrfachsucht. Mein Weg in die Genesung begann nicht mit Essen – zunächst war ich in einem 12-Schritte-Programm für Drogensüchtige. Mit der Zeit wurde mir jedoch klar, dass Essen in meinem Leben die gleiche Funktion hatte wie Drogen. Es war nicht einfach Nahrung – es war meine Droge.

Obwohl ich keine starken Gewichtsschwankungen hatte und oft als schlank galt, war mein Denken ständig vom Essen und der Kontrolle meines Gewichts bestimmt. Ich war ein ängstliches, gehemmtes Kind und habe in dieser Zeit viel verbale Gewalt erlebt. Essen wurde mein Rückzugsort, mein Trost.

Viele Jahre lang habe ich mir mein Verhalten schöngeredet und verharmlost – obwohl ich Essen zwanghaft und wie eine Droge missbrauchte. Ich habe sehr darunter gelitten, auch wenn es nach außen kaum sichtbar war.

Schließlich führte mich ein mehrtägiger Fressanfall an meinen Tiefpunkt – und direkt zu FA. Dieser Moment wurde zum Beginn meiner wirklichen Genesung. Heute bin ich zutiefst dankbar für die Klarheit, Ehrlichkeit und Freiheit, die mir dieses Programm geschenkt hat.

Food Is Also a Drug I am a member of Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA), and I live with multiple addictions. My recovery journey did not begin with food—I first entered a 12-Step program for drug addiction. Over time, however, it became clear to me that food functioned in my life the same way drugs had. Food was not just food; it was my drug of choice.

Although I did not experience extreme weight fluctuations and was often considered slim, my mind was constantly consumed by food and controlling my weight. From a young age, I was anxious, inhibited, and exposed to significant verbal aggression. Food became my refuge and my relief.

I spent years minimizing and justifying my behavior—telling myself stories that made my eating seem harmless, even as I was using food compulsively and addictively. I suffered deeply, though much of it was hidden from the outside world.

Eventually, a multi-day binge brought me to my breaking point—and into Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous. That moment marked the beginning of true recovery for me. Today, I am profoundly grateful for the clarity, honesty, and freedom this program has given me.

As the oldest child in my family, I learned to take on the responsibility of caring for others, setting my own needs aside. My father often rewarded me with fast food. In college, isolated from family, I walked a mile every night to restaurants seeking comfort. Even as I climbed the corporate ladder, I felt inadequate and continued using food to manage my anxiety. After my father's death, I put my mother first. For over a decade, I cared for her while frequenting every drive-thru near her assisted living facility. My adult life may have looked successful from the outside, but I continued struggling privately, and I used food to cope. After years of trying to manage on my own and reaching 224 pounds, I found Food Addicts in Recovery Anonymous (FA) and heard my own story reflected back to me. What I discovered wasn’t a failure of willpower, but an addiction that required help beyond myself. Through sponsorship, meetings, and the Twelve Steps, my obsession with food lifted, and the excess weight disappeared. Now, passing my 14th anniversary in FA, life still brings challenges, but I have a roadmap for navigating them. The structure of FA has given me more freedom than I ever had when eating whatever I wanted. One day at a time, I live in gratitude, thankful I accepted the opportunity to live in recovery rather than remain stuck in addiction.