Days before Taylor Frankie Paul’s season of The Bachelorette was set to air, TMZ released footage of a violent incident between her and her ex, Dakota, from 2023. ABC pulled the season.

Together, Shannon and Tashmica talk through what the video shows and what it doesn’t, why one moment of volatility can’t tell us who is setting up a pattern of power and control, and who is surviving it. They unpack why the timing of the tape’s release matters. And they call out the very selective outrage of a Reality TV franchise like The Bachelor that has quietly welcomed accused abusers onto its stages season after season.

And here's the thing — we know they can do better, because they already have. In 2017, Bachelor in Paradise intervened immediately and shut down production for two weeks after a misconduct incident on set. Everyone went home. So this isn't about capability. It's about choice.

(Hint: if you want to hear more about what accountability on a reality TV set can look like — and what it costs when it doesn't show up — check out our ANTM episode: Aging Like Hot Ice Cream.)

This episode is about Taylor Frankie Paul. It’s also about every person in your life you’ve watched spiral without intervening. And it’s about what it would look like if we actually cared about getting this right.

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