From the creators of Master Leaf Theatre comes a tale of the duality of man, of corporate greed and of a rich asshole who is also very cheap. The Carolina Hurricanes are currently in the Stanley Cup final against the Vegas Golden Knights. What many hockey fans may not know is that at the end of March, Hurricanes owner Tom Dundon purchased the Portland Trail Blazers of the NBA for about $4.8 billion and immediately set about cutting costs that sent red flags up all over the basketball world. So while hockey people think of Dundon as a savior, NBA people think of him as something else: "El Cheapo." Along with our actual British friend Gavin Taylor (and with ample inspiration from Charles Dickens and Ebenezer Scrooge), we dramatize just a few of the articles that have outlined Dundon's frugality and the writers who have come to his defense, including one Master Leaf Theatre All Star. There is mascot drama, hotel fee drama, t-shirt drama, coaching search drama and mass layoffs that are neither dramatic nor funny, but are sadly a fact of life in 2026. It's possible that Dundon wins a championship as early as this week. He'll still be a rich, weird, cheap asshole. Works Cited: Chris Mannix’s Notes: Checkout time for Portland, Sports Illustrated, April 15 Ranking All the Ways New Blazers Owner Tom Dundon Is Reportedly Trying to Save Money During Playoff Run by Liam McKeone, Sports Illustrated, April 22 Blazers owner Tom Dundon discusses relocation, cost-cutting measures, Billups’ arrest, more by Joe Freeman, The Oregonian, May 16 Blazers lay off dozens as new team owner takes over by By Joe Freeman and Bill Oram, The Oregonian, May 20 How a controversial new NBA owner funded an NHL powerhouse to the Stanley Cup Final by James Mirtle, The Athletic, June 2 “Should we root for or against the Carolina Hurricanes as Blazers Fans” r/RipCity, June 5 Further Reading: There's a new contender for worst owner in sports by Drew Magary, SFGATE, April 28 Before Tom Dundon Agreed to Buy the Portland Trail Blazers, Oregon Accused the Company He Created of Predatory Lending by Tony Schick and Conrad Wilson, ProPublica, October 3, 2025 The NBA’s Newest, Cheapest Owner Shows How Billionaires Ruin Sports by Quinn Everts, Current Affairs, May 27 ‘Give it some time:’ Inside Tom Dundon’s NHL success amid Trail Blazer uncertainty by Bill Oram, The Oregonian, May 26 Tom Dundon revealed: Trail Blazers owner opens up about layoffs, Portland politicians and ‘Jail Blazers’ by Bill Oram, The Oregonian, May 30 Subscribe to our Patreon! Members get ad-free episodes of all our shows, bonus podcasts, written posts, chats with us and much more.Visit our friends! Vintage Ice Hockey for t-shirts, hoodies and jerseys with hundreds of classic hockey logos, as well as the full line of Islanders Anxiety merch. As always our portion of those sales go directly to the Center for Dementia Research. The Pinot Project has a Rosé, a Pinot Grigio and a Wine Enthusiast Best Buy Pinot Noir, all under $15 a bottle. Available at local wine stores and UBS Arena. Visit Lighthousehockey.com for the most up-to-date Islanders news and discussion. Islanders Anxiety podcasts are part of the Fans First Sports Network (@FansFirstSN). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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