In this episode of Paradigm Shifting Books, hosts Stephen and Britain Covey explore Habit 1, Be Proactive, from their grandfather Stephen R. Covey's The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Featuring archival audio clips of their grandfather teaching in the 1980s and 90s, this "Power Principle" episode reveals the difference between proactive and reactive living. Dr. Covey shares Viktor Frankl's discovery of the "last human freedom," the power to choose your response to any circumstance, and the story of a nurse who realized she had chosen her own misery and could therefore choose otherwise.

In the second clip, Dr. Covey introduces the Circle of Influence vs. Circle of Concern through the story of Ben, an employee who transformed his organization by focusing on what he could control. Stephen and Britain reflect on why taking responsibility is not daunting but deeply empowering and why this timeless wisdom is more urgent than ever.

Tune in to hear Stephen R. Covey's own voice teach these powerful principles and discover how one simple shift in focus can change everything.

What We Discuss

• [00:00] Introduction
• [00:40] What makes this episode different
• [01:58] Habit 1 explained
• [02:26] The opposite of proactive
• [03:18] Viktor Frankl and the last human freedom
• [05:20] The nurse story: from prison to liberation
• [07:26] Why taking ownership feels daunting but is ultimately empowering
• [08:56] The circle of influence and circle of concern
• [09:19] Where proactive vs. reactive people focus their energy
• [12:00] The story of Ben
• [14:24] Conclusion

Resources

Paradigm Shifting Books

• Podcast
• Instagram
• YouTube

Book

• The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey

Stephen R. Covey

• LinkedIn
• Instagram

Britain Covey

• LinkedIn
• Instagram

Stephen H. Covey

• LinkedIn

Mentioned Episode

• Viktor Frankl – Man’s Search for Meaning

In Part 2 of this episode of Paradigm Shifting Books, hosts Stephen and Britain Covey continue their conversation with their father, Stephen M. R. Covey, bestselling author of The Speed of Trust. Picking up where Part 1 left off, this half dives deeper into what high-trust leadership looks like in practice, from boardrooms to family dinner tables, and why the companies that are already good at trust are the ones most determined to get better at it.

Stephen M. R. Covey walks through real-world examples of organizations that used trust as a performance multiplier, including Frito-Lay's Al Carey and the iconic Doritos Locos Taco partnership with Taco Bell, a billion-dollar product launched without a contract because two CEOs trusted each other completely. He unpacks the five waves of trust and makes the case that everything starts from the inside out, beginning with self-trust.

The episode also gets personal. Stephen and Britain revisit a teenage speeding ticket that became a masterclass in how trust is lost, owned, and rebuilt through behavior, not words. Stephen M. R. Covey shares his own story of having to restore trust with a colleague he had unfairly criticized as CEO, walking through what it actually looks like to behave your way back into a relationship. The episode closes with two immediately actionable takeaways for anyone who wants to increase trust this week.

What We Discuss

• [00:00] Introduction
• [01:30] Why companies that are already good at trust want to get even better
• [02:53] Case study: Frito Lay, Taco Bell, and the billion dollar Doritos Locos Taco
• [08:56] The five waves of trust
• [16:17] Making and keeping commitments to yourself to rebuild self-trust
• [18:13] Rebuilding trust once it's been lost: two paradigm shifts
• [22:50] Britain's teenage speeding ticket story
• [26:56] Stephen M. R. Covey's personal leadership failure
• [32:54] Two practical takeaways to increase trust this week
• [38:59] Closing reflections from Stephen and Britain

Resources

Paradigm Shifting Books

• Podcast
• Instagram
• YouTube

Book

• The Speed of Trust by Stephen M. R. Covey

Stephen M. R. Covey

• LinkedIn

Britain Covey

• LinkedIn
• Instagram

Stephen H. Covey

• LinkedIn

In Part 1 of this 2-part episode of Paradigm Shifting Books, hosts Stephen and Britain Covey sit down with their father, Stephen M. R. Covey, to revisit The Speed of Trust nearly 20 years after it was written. Together, they explore the ideas behind the book, what Stephen M. R. Covey has learned after two decades of teaching trust around the world, and why trust remains one of the most important forces in leadership, business, teams, and relationships.

Stephen M. R. Covey shares how the book grew out of his experience during the merger between Covey Leadership Center and FranklinCovey. Even though both companies had good people and strong values, years of competition created low trust inside the newly combined organization. Decisions slowed down, costs increased, people questioned motives, and the team became more internally focused than customer focused. That experience helped him see that trust is not just a social virtue, but a measurable economic force.

The conversation unpacks two major paradigm shifts at the heart of The Speed of Trust: trust is financial, not just social, and trust is learnable. Stephen M. R. Covey explains how leaders and teams can intentionally build trust through credibility, behavior, language, frameworks, and practical action. Stephen and Britain also connect these ideas to sports, football, the Los Angeles Rams, and high-performing teams, showing why trust changes everything and why it can be built on purpose.

What We Discuss

• 00:00 - Introduction
• 00:43 - Revisiting The Speed of Trust with Stephen M. R. Covey
• 08:18 - Why Trust Became Stephen M. R. Covey’s Life Work
• 10:47 - The Big Shift: Trust Is Financial, Not Just Social
• 12:36 - The Second Shift: Trust Is a Learnable Skill
• 21:16 - What Sports Teams Reveal About High and Low Trust
• 22:37 - The Backup Quarterback Test for Trust
• 23:48 - Why Talent Alone Is Never Enough
• 25:28 - The Power of Talent and Trust Together

Notable Quotes

• [11:55] "Trust is financial, not just social. There's a business case for trust, and it's a compelling case." — Stephen M. R. Covey
• [12:55] “Trust is learnable. It’s a learnable skill. It’s a learnable competency.” – Stephen M.R. Covey
• [18:39] "Trust is the one thing that changes everything." — Stephen M. R. Covey

Resources

Paradigm Shifting Books

• Podcast
• Instagram
• YouTube

Book

• The Speed of Trust by Stephen M. R. Covey

Stephen M. R. Covey

• LinkedIn

Britain Covey

• LinkedIn
• Instagram

Stephen H. Covey

• LinkedIn

In this episode of Paradigm Shifting Books, hosts Stephen Covey and Britain Covey dive into Daniel Pink's groundbreaking book Drive, which challenges everything we think we know about what motivates people. They explore why the traditional "carrot and stick" approach to motivation works for some tasks but actively undermines the kind of complex, creative work that defines most of what we do today. Drawing on decades of social science research, Pink lays out a compelling framework for understanding what truly drives human performance.

Stephen and Britain reflect on how these ideas apply far beyond the office, from NFL locker rooms to families to personal growth. Britain shares a vivid story from his time as a scout team player in the NFL, illustrating how a simple moment of recognition from a coach unlocked a sense of purpose he had not felt before. Stephen ties the book's core principles, autonomy, mastery, and purpose, directly to leadership, noting that when leaders design environments around these three drivers, motivation follows naturally. This episode is a must listen for anyone who leads a team, raises a family, or simply wants to understand what makes us do our best work.

What We Discuss

• [00:00] Introduction
• [00:35] Why Dan Wrote Drive
• [02:11] Carrots Sticks Problem
• [04:10] If Then Rewards: When They Work and When They Don't
• [06:43] Money as a Threshold Motivator, Not the Whole Story
• [13:09] Autonomy, Mastery, and Purpose: The Three Core Motivators
• [16:00] NFL Story on Purpose
• [18:33] Connecting Drive to Leadership, Sports, and Life
• [21:05] Resume Virtues vs. Eulogy Virtues: Redefining Success

Notable Quotes

• [04:30] "If-then rewards are very effective for simple tasks with short time horizons." – Daniel Pink
• [06:17] "The problem with if-then rewards is not the reward, it's the contingency, the if-thenness of it. Because if-thenness is a form of control." – Daniel Pink
• [08:37] "The best use of money as a motivator is to pay people enough to take the issue of money off the table." – Daniel Pink
• [13:14] "Once you're through the threshold, there are three core motivators for long-term performance on complex tasks: autonomy, mastery, and purpose." – Daniel Pink
• [22:59] "Find something you care about and get really good at it, because the act of getting good at something you care about is inherently satisfying." – Daniel Pink

Resources

Paradigm Shifting Books

• Podcast
• Instagram
• YouTube

Book

• Drive by Daniel Pink

Daniel Pink

• Website
• Instagram
• LinkedIn
• YouTube

Britain Covey

• LinkedIn
• Instagram

Stephen H. Covey

• LinkedIn

In this episode of Paradigm Shifting Books, hosts Stephen and Britain Covey take a deeper dive into one of the foundational ideas behind The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: the maturity continuum. Building on their recent conversation with Dan Coyle about flourishing and human connection, they explore the progression from dependence to independence to interdependence, and why so much of modern self-improvement culture stops short of the ultimate goal. Drawing directly from the teachings of Stephen R. Covey, they unpack why independence is often celebrated as the highest form of growth, even though life itself is inherently interconnected.

Stephen and Britain reflect on how these ideas apply to leadership, relationships, teamwork, and personal fulfillment. They discuss the dangers of victim thinking, the rise of hyper-individualism, and the growing appeal of “monk mode” culture in a world that increasingly rewards isolation and self-focus. Through personal stories, sports analogies, and timeless insights from The 7 Habits, they make the case that true flourishing happens not in separation from others, but through meaningful collaboration, trust, and shared growth. This episode is a powerful reminder that independence is not the final destination of maturity, but the foundation that allows us to fully thrive together.

What We Discuss

• [00:00] Introduction
• [01:43] The maturity continuum explained
• [02:13] Dependence: the starting point
• [02:58] Independence: personal responsibility and discipline
• [03:55] Interdependence: the highest level of the continuum
• [05:25] Reading from The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: the limits of independence
• [10:16] Self-reflection: where are you on the maturity continuum?
• [11:13] The role of “monk mode” and private victories
• [13:08] Modern life: isolation vs. interdependence
• [14:53] Conclusion

Notable Quotes

• [03:41] "Independence is the paradigm of I can do it, right? I am responsible, I am self-reliant, I can choose." – Britain Covey
• [10:03] "Strength is found in differences more than it is in similarities in a relationship." – Britain Covey
• [13:02] "Growth doesn't stop at independence. That's really just the foundation." – Stephen Covey
• [10:56] "Interdependence is a choice only independent people can make." – Stephen R. Covey

Resources

Paradigm Shifting Books

• Podcast
• Instagram
• YouTube

Book

• The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey

Britain Covey

• LinkedIn
• Instagram

Stephen H. Covey

• LinkedIn

Mentioned Episode

Why We Need Other People to Become Our Best Selves (Part 1) with Daniel Coyle

In Part 2 of their conversation on Paradigm Shifting Books, hosts Stephen and Britain Covey dive deeper with bestselling author Dan Coyle into the practical, human side of flourishing. Dan reveals why being a great teammate is actually the highest form of leadership, shares his kids' brilliant insight that "annoyance is the price of community," and explains how AI for all its power can't ask a single good question.

The episode is filled with personal stories, from Britain's NFL experience helping a competitor to Dan's upcoming "battle of the bands" with his dad friends in Brooklyn. They close with two simple but profound questions anyone can ask to start flourishing this week: Who do I feel most alive with? and What am I helping to grow?

Tune in to hear the full conversation and discover how to start flourishing today.

What We Discuss

• [02:25] Guardrails and Freedom: Why Living Systems Need Space to Breathe
• [05:21] The Elite Teammate Move: Looking Around for Someone to Help
• [10:30] Annoyance Is the Price of Community
• [13:30] AI and the Humanist Revival: What Artificial Intelligence Reveals About Us
• [15:41] Why Flourish Is Dan's Most Personal Book
• [18:06] Stupid Stuff With Friends: The Unexpected Gift of the Book
• [20:20] Red Doors, Green Doors, and Yellow Doors
• [21:35] Where to Start: Two Questions That Audit Your Flourishing

Notable Quotes

• [06:20] " When there's a good leader, people say, oh, what a good leader. When there's a great leader, the people say, we did it ourselves.'" – Dan Coyle
• [10:34] "Annoyance is the price of community. And community is the only way you're gonna be saved." – Dan Coyle
• [21:37] "Who do I feel most alive with? And what am I helping to grow? Those two questions are a little spotlight, a little auditing you can do of your world." – Dan Coyle

Resources

Paradigm Shifting Books

• Podcast
• Instagram
• YouTube

Book

• Flourish by Dan Coyle

Dan Coyle

• Website
• Facebook
• LinkedIn
• Books: The Talent Code, The Culture Code

Britain Covey

• LinkedIn
• Instagram

Stephen H. Covey

• LinkedIn

In this episode of Paradigm Shifting Books, hosts Stephen and Britain Covey sit down with bestselling author Dan Coyle, whose books The Talent Code and The Culture Code have already reshaped how we think about individual growth and team dynamics. Now, with his latest book, Flourish, Dan takes an even bigger step, exploring not just how we perform or collaborate, but how we build truly meaningful lives and communities. At the heart of it all is a radical reframe: flourishing isn't something you achieve alone. It's mutual, shared, and rooted in connection.

Stephen and Britain reflect on how Dan's ideas echo their grandfather's concept of the maturity continuum, the journey from dependence to independence to interdependence, and how Flourish makes the case that interdependence, not independence, is the real destination. Dan shares vivid stories from his research, including the miraculous survival of the 33 Chilean miners, the New England Patriots' Super Bowl run, and a $90 million deli ecosystem in Ann Arbor, to illustrate how questions, pauses, and shared vulnerability unlock something in people that answers and productivity never can. This episode is a must-listen for anyone who wants to move from self-improvement to shared flourishing in their teams, families, and everyday lives.

What We Discuss

• [00:00] Introduction
• [02:09] What Does It Mean to Flourish? Redefining Success
• [04:28] The Backpack of Individualism and How to Put It Down
• [05:45] Task Attention vs. Relational Attention: The Toggle Switch in Your Brain
• [07:39] Why Questions Unite and Answers Drive People Apart
• [10:31] Life as Treasure Creation, Not a Treasure Hunt
• [11:11] The Four H Exercise and the New England Patriots
• [22:01] Lessons from the Chilean Miners
• [26:21] Embracing the Beautiful Mess

Notable Quotes

• [02:10] "The scientific definition of flourishing would be: joyful, meaningful, growth shared. And the piece that surprised me was that last word." – Dan Coyle
• [08:01] "The places that really end up flourishing are ones that are able to really dig into deep questions and create space for people to circle up and explore those questions together." – Dan Coyle
• [23:52] "Paradigm shifts only happen with questions. They never happen with answers." – Dan Coyle
• [27:36] "If you're gonna have a system that's alive, imperfection should be celebrated. If you're doing it all a hundred percent perfectly, you're not doing it right." – Dan Coyle

Resources

Paradigm Shifting Books

• Podcast
• Instagram
• YouTube

Book

• Flourish by Dan Coyle

Dan Coyle

• Website
• Facebook
• LinkedIn
• Books: The Talent Code, The Culture Code

Britain Covey

• LinkedIn
• Instagram

Stephen H. Covey

• LinkedIn

Happy New Year! In this special episode of Paradigm Shifting Books, hosts Stephen and Britain Covey revisit a foundational principle from their grandfather, Stephen R. Covey, to set the tone for the year: "Life is not about accumulation, it is about contribution."

Moving beyond typical New Year's resolutions focused on achievement and acquisition, Stephen and Britain explore why shifting your focus to giving rather than getting is the key to deeper happiness and lasting fulfillment. They unpack the difference between "Primary Greatness" (character, integrity, contribution) and "Secondary Greatness" (titles, fame, fortune), explaining that while pursuing external success is not wrong, building a life on the bedrock of contribution is what makes success meaningful and enduring.

Britain shares a powerful personal story from the NFL, highlighting how veteran teammate Brandon Graham consciously fights a culture of transactional relationships by contributing to every new player. This serves as a model for choosing connection over comparison in any environment. Stephen reflects on a recent family experience serving at a local ministry, which recentered him on what truly matters as a parent.

Backed by research from Harvard, UCLA, and thinkers like Adam Grant, this conversation is a timely reset for anyone feeling the pressure to constantly achieve and acquire. It is a call to find greater joy in 2026 by focusing on the unseen, noble work of contributing to the people right in front of you.

What We Discuss

• [00:00] Introduction to Paradigm Shifting Books
• [00:57] Contribution over accumulation: a core principle
• [02:00] Research and studies supporting contribution
• [03:46] Primary vs. secondary greatness
• [04:46] Personal reflections on contribution
• [07:02] NFL insights: Brandon Graham's example
• [14:44] Family and community contributions
• [17:29] Conclusion and reflections for the new year

Notable Quotes

• [01:17] “Life is not about accumulation. It’s about contribution.” – Stephen R. Covey
• [04:02] “You can have secondary greatness without primary greatness, but it won’t last.” – Stephen R. Covey
• [05:24] “My happiness is greatly affected when I live out of a desire for contribution more than accumulation.” – Britain Covey
• [06:57] “ You don't have to be an extrovert to have contribution to other people.” – Britain Covey

Resources

Paradigm Shifting Books

• Podcast
• Instagram
• YouTube

Britain Covey

• LinkedIn
• Instagram

Stephen H. Covey

• LinkedIn