Simon Mayo's Confessions cover art

Simon Mayo's Confessions

Simon Mayo's Confessions

By: Bauer Media
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Hilarious revelations from a new generation of sinners, willing to share their secrets in search of forgiveness with Father Simon and the Confessional Collective. Expect tales of greed, debauchery, deception, and honest mistakes including those confessions we could never broadcast on Greatest Hits Radio.

Simon Mayo's Confessions
Episodes
  • You’ve been, you’ve been thunderstruck & other tales

    You’ve been, you’ve been thunderstruck & other tales
    Jun 26 2026

    Step into the confessional with Simon Mayo and the Confessions Collective for sibling “rugby practice” that ends in A&E, a holiday comeback that goes painfully wrong, a Dolly Parton impression and a truly grim Vaseline mix-up.

    Nick relives 1984: a beanbag tackle bag, a perfectly executed “chop tackle”, and a sister’s head meeting a handmade doll’s house — followed by a bunk-bed cover story… and stolen cola cubes.

    Plus: Stephanie tries to thunderstrike her prankster husband, Mr Lloyd double-dips, and Dave’s Dolly Parton watermelon routine has terrible consequences.

    Got a confession? confessions@greatesthitsradio.co.uk
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    38 mins
  • In through the out door & other tales

    In through the out door & other tales
    Jun 19 2026

    Step into the confessional with Simon Mayo and the Collective for exam cheating in a lucky jumper, a welding lesson that goes catastrophically… south, and a nursing “snapshot” you may not want to hear while eating. First, Homer admits to a very 70s kind of malpractice: smuggling fully-loaded notes into a final exam on official paper and somehow ending up a headteacher. Then apprentice welder Steve hands a gas torch to a hoity-toity naval officer who won’t do her jacket up — cue molten metal, bedlam, and a breakdancing stripper moment. Plus: Emma’s 80s Saturday job prank with “party poppers”, and Susan’s slippery suppository nightmare… Got a confession? confessions@greatesthitsradio.co.uk
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    43 mins
  • Oh! This is the greatest show & other tales

    Oh! This is the greatest show & other tales
    Jun 12 2026
    Step into the confessional with Simon Mayo and the Confessions Collective for naked ramblers, dodgy “shampoo”, and a circus moment nobody in grey trousers will ever forget. Jamie and Sara take a sat-nav shortcut straight into a countryside encounter with a group of naturist ramblers — and a hedge full of nettles. Don’t look… but you will. Then Tim rewinds to bath night, 1968: a seven-year-old, an Action Man mission, and a shampoo bottle that leaves Dad and big brother wondering why the “herbs” smell so weird. Plus: Mick nicks go-kart tickets at the school fête and pays for it in broken bones, and Al’s mum becomes the unexpected star of the big top after one too many bottles of juice. Got a confession? confessions@greatesthitsradio.co.uk
    Show More Show Less
    40 mins
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All stars
Most relevant
five stars absolutely. i listen to the superb confessions whilst im cleaning at the local dentist, and they often have the same affect as sucking on a pipe full of dental laughing gas!
the predictable guilty and non guilty verdicts of sister holly and brother matt, and the amazing vocal talents of father simon make the evening go quicker.
keep up the wonderful work, louise in bridport

laughing gas and confessions

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Just super. Laugh out loud funny. Everyone on the train thinks I'm the nutter - at least I always get a seat to myself!

The funniest show on radio today

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Mat is ace, holly is brilliant, the team are fantastic and Simon is the bestest especially when he does his accent’s, this podcast is my favourite and I eagerly wait for Friday to indulge in the stories of other peoples mishaps and adventures. If there was a button for 6+ stars I’d press it. Keep up the awesome work.

6 stars and more…..

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So glad this podcast has returned. I listen whilst doing the ironing, which has now become a bearable chore again with the laughs. Matt's convoluted reasons to forgive get better each time.

Welcome back

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5 stars!! Can't always catch the drive time show live, so Iove the opportunity to listen to the podcast. Also love the Mark Knopfler Broadcast section... But where has Confessions From The Crypt gone?? I always used to try and guess what Matt's reason to forgive would be!!

Bring back Confessions From The Crypt

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