Can you think of a moment that turned your life into ‘before’ and ‘after’?

For Reuben Williams, that moment was not his sexual assault, rather, the decision he made in the aftermath to pursue justice.

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Incredibly vulnerable, Reuben talks Hugh, Ryan and Josh through what it felt like in the 24 hours after the assault, how he knew, undeniably, what happened to him was wrong, and why he chose to report it.

We talk about the intricacies of healing, privilege, and having a world class difficult conversation with the ones you love.

And then, Josh asks Reuben how you can best show up for your friends who might be going through something similar.

Reuben, it was such a privilege having you in the studio.

If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/okQnOwV2MJE

0:00 – An Imperfect Meet-Cute
6:44 – The night of the assault
19:28 – Identity, privilege, and idealism
33:09 – Family Dynamics
41:16 - World Class Difficult Conversation
47:39 – The Waiting Game
59:15 – Reuben’s Letter
1:04:24 – A divine test
1:10:30 – Just help
1:18:46 – How can you be a better friend?

🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode

• Rana Hussain - Belonging For Connection - https://bit.ly/49voquJ

🎧Things to listen to

• SportsGrad Podcast - https://bit.ly/42V75HT

💻Things to check out

• SportsGrad - https://bit.ly/49p2hOD

🚨If you’d like to reach out to someone for support after listening to this episode, here are some great places to start

• 1800 RESPECT
• Centre Against Sexual Assault - 03 5441 0430 (Mon-Fri 9am-5pm) OR 1800 806 292 (Sexual Assault Crisis Line)

🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz

🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW

🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu

🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects

The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In a world so divided by hate, how can we choose to show love?

This week we are joined by journalist Jan Fran, who unpacks the horror of witnessing horror.

💌Join 6,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

Talking through her unravelling relationship with social media and the utter helplessness she feels watching atrocities cut into 30 second clips, Jan explores how becoming a mother cracked her open in ways she didn’t know possible.

Joining us in the Vulnerabilitea House to answer every question in the deck (kidding), Jan and Josh discuss the guilt of turning away, and the consequences of leaning in.

And finally, Jan bonds with the Hugh, Ryan and Josh about the fundamental importance of deliberately creating community.

Jan, you are remarkable.

0:00 – Introducing Josh’s housemate
8:42 – The art of being vulnerable
17:19 – I wish I could stop going on social media.
27:13 – Being cracked open
35:32 – Deliberately building community
46:39 – Anticipating the Comments
53:34 – Optimist by will

If you’d like to watch this full video on YouTube (and see Josh’s Frant banner), follow this link - https://youtu.be/BRoyNdZEZD0

🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode

• Dr Edna Lekgabe - New Baby … New Brain … Matrescence - (33:21) - https://bit.ly/48vQZb5
• How (and Why) Ryan Dumped His iPhone - (20:50) - https://bit.ly/4tGRXKj

💻Things to check out

• The Frant - https://bit.ly/4cSeFaO
• Ette Media - https://bit.ly/4t1OzIw

🎧 Things to listen to

• We Used To Be Journos - https://bit.ly/4dcAGT9

📱Things to help you set social media boundaries

• One sec - https://bit.ly/4cEYMpF
• Brick - https://bit.ly/4vXSzfP

🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz

🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW

🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu

🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects

The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

According to perinatal and reproductive psychiatrist Dr Edna Lekgabe, matrescence is the motherhood equivalent of adolescence. Puberty 2.0, if you will.

💌Join 6,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

Joining us in the academy of imperfection, Dr Edna explores the cataclysmic identity shift women undergo during motherhood, and how partners can best support them.

Exploring the impacts of mastrescence with Hugh, Ryan and Josh, Dr Edna breaks down the difference between matrescence, anxiety and depression, and why mental illness is the number one pregnancy complication.

We’re talking hormonal changes, physiological changes, sociological changes that are SO significant, you can see them in brain scans. Matrescence is messy, a developmental earthquake, and it’s not talked about nearly enough.

This episode might just break the internet (and your heart) wide open.

0:00 – Introducing Hugh’s perinatal psychiatrist
7:30 – Matrescence? Huh?
21:14 – The biology of baby brain
34:10 – The difference between matrescence and depression
40:46 – Reasonable worry vs anxiety disorder
47:40 – The emergence of neurodivergence
54:04 – Post-natal depression
1:00:04 – Matrescence after loss
1:05:50 – Getting to know a brand new person
1:11:19 – Can women have it all?
1:18:32 – On a societal scale
1:26:12 – The paternal earthquake

If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link -

🫖 Other Imperfect’s episodes mentioned in this episode

• Bron Lewis - Is It Me or Postnatal Anxiety? - https://bit.ly/4vHn1eh

📖 Things to read

• Being Female: Reproduction, Power and Change, by Dana Raphael - https://bit.ly/48jC5EO
• The Birth of a Mother, New York Times, by Alexandra Sacks - https://bit.ly/3OjB9tp
• Men at Work: Australia’s Parenthood Trap, Quarterly Essay, by Annabel Crabb - https://bit.ly/4mLE8Hx

🎧Things to listen to

• Perinatal OCD: When ‘the happiest time of your life’ turns dark - https://bit.ly/48lx8eK

📺 Things to watch

• Alexandra Sacks TEDTalk on Matrescence - https://bit.ly/4tsBcCt

💻Things to check out

• Yerkes-Dodson Law: Stress Level - https://bit.ly/4cOT2IO
• peanut x Tommee Tippee campaign on matrescence - https://bit.ly/4mQDicU

🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz

🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW

🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu

🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects

The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.