Showing results by narrator "Joe Hempel" in All Categories

Damien St. Cloud is a failure. Born into a family of warlords and blessed with the most powerful soul force in history, he’s unable to make his powers work. A disappointment to his legendary father and a weakling compared to his sister, Damien’s life is miserable. Then his life changes forever when a visiting sorcerer proclaims Damien isn’t a warlord at all but a sorcerer.

Thirty years ago, the town of Briarwood was left shattered by the gruesome murders committed by Jones Jepsen. His brutal reign of terror claimed the lives of many of the town's residents, earning him a seat in the electric chair.

Former actress and lifestyle guru Donna Bruce is found dead in her sauna cabin, the victim of a swarm of bees. With the town buzzing about whodunit, reporter Odelia Poole and Detective Chase Kingsley are on the case. Meanwhile, Max, Odelia’s blorange tabby, has a crisis of his own—he’s been put on a strict diet! Weak, cranky, and deprived of snacks, solving crimes is harder than ever. And to make matters worse, Odelia has put Harriet, her mother’s white Persian, in charge of the feline investigation! Harriet’s idea of detective work? Scrolling through celebrity gossip and watching cat videos.

Jaunty the Clown just wants to entertain families with lighthearted slapstick antics, but people think of clowns as terrifying, nightmarish creatures who hide in closets or under beds. When Jaunty, along with his fellow performers, are fired from the circus, they're told that the world just doesn't like clowns anymore. Still, clowns have to eat. And since these clowns don't eat children, to make ends meet they're eventually forced to take a job in a popular haunted attraction, the Mountain of Terror. But millions of oversized spiders are about to invade....

Meet the new, improved Andrew Mayhem. He has a real job. He’s a better father and husband. And he’s vowed to quit accepting money from strange women in coffee shops to perform tasks that go terribly, terribly wrong. This time, he’s just taking a relaxing camping trip with his family and best friend. No shortcuts. The gas tank is full. The sinister warning of the crazy old man is taken seriously. Unfortunately, when you’re Andrew Mayhem, you just can’t help being attacked by a group of savage killers bent on inflicting ghastly torture and bringing horrific death.

Conryu's life was supposed to be peaceful after the fall of Morgana. Two months living on the floating island and working on bikes have been among the best of his life. But that all changes when Jemma St. Simmons, Director of the Ministry of Magic in London, contacts him looking for help. Conryu is forced once more to get involved in a dangerous magical situation. Now faced with an enemy that negates his greatest strength, can Conryu find a way to defeat a long-forgotten foe before it's too late?

X is trapped living in the slums of the last remaining city on Earth. He can only venture out beyond the towering walls to scavenge relics of the old world when the sun is up. At night, like everybody else, he hides inside from the monsters of the shadows...until an unexpected death occurs a little too close to home. With the blame on his shoulders, and trigger-happy guards on his trail, X has no choice but to run. But the city was never a safe place to begin with, not really, and his only slim chance of survival lies outside the walls, in a landscape empty of humanity.

Reclusive chef Heinrich Schauer has invited six guests to a blind 12-course tasting menu. As they eat, each guest is overtaken by carnal appetites, unaware of their host's savage plan - or of the creature lurking below.

Lance Corporal Daniel J. Smith has a plan: finish his tour of duty with the North American Alliance Marines, return home to Sentinel City, and marry his girlfriend. Sounds simple, but as he’s picking out an engagement ring, Daniel is struck by overwhelming pain as his soul gets ripped from his body and dragged across reality to a new world, a world of swords and magic. Daniel barely has time to get used to his new body before he’s whisked away to speak to a king. A king who informs him that he’s been summoned to fight the Demon King.

A woman’s body is found floating in a sultry Florida mangrove. She has no ID, and there is no indication of cause of death. Who is she? Who killed her? Everyone has dark secrets that will be revealed. Rookie Detective Tom Lange couldn’t have landed a more difficult first case. The only thing he has to go on is the woman’s butterfly tattoo. His boss, Lauren Blythe, piles the pressure on, and the medical examiner won’t tell him what he needs to know.

For centuries, the governments of the world have kept the half-elf Morgana locked in a prison where she couldn't use her magic. Now, her fanatical followers are on the verge of setting her free. Meanwhile, the best hope of defeating her is trapped in an inter-dimensional library unaware of the chaos engulfing the Alliance.    

It doesn't seem like the perfect house, but screw it, it's good enough to rent for a year. Unfortunately for Boyd, Adeline, and their two young daughters, it's immediately clear they chose the wrong place. The nightmare begins with violent coughs and headaches. Food starts to rot almost as soon as they take it inside. A pet tarantula goes missing. Some family members begin to exhibit creepy behavior. Then the ghosts arrive, and all hell breaks loose....

With matters in The Five Kingdoms reasonably settled, Danny sets out for Elfhome. He hopes to make the trip quickly so he can begin his search for the secrets of the summoning spell that brought him to Valindor. Unfortunately, life seldom works out the way Danny would prefer and soon he finds himself mixed up in the search for the source of a deadly plague spreading through the area. No matter his preferences, with people dying by the hundreds, Danny can’t just ignore the problem and move on. Soon he finds himself investigating corrupt politicians, greedy merchants, and mad wizards.

The nations of the Continent are on the verge of declaring war with Audland over the actions of the man who would be the next Mage Emperor, and only Tane, Kadka, Indree, and Tinga know the truth about Endo Stooke's plot. The problem is, they're on the run, blamed for the attempted assassination of the Belgrian Kaiser. And the non-magical forces gathering off Audland's coast are the perfect target for the terrible spell Endo has created—a spell that saps the life out of anyone without magic. A spell that won't be sated by foreign armies alone, if it reaches Audish shores.

Fourteen-year-old Eric Ross is struggling. His father is in prison for murder. His mother has slipped into addiction. Even if he can survive the bullying and the sudden run of disappearances, he has little hope for a future outside of the sleepy Massachusetts fishing town he calls home. But there is something far more important on his mind. He found her down beneath the local entertainment pier, and she seems just about perfect. Except for the teeth. But she doesn't want to simply be a part of his world. She wants more . . .

The Rising: Selected Scenes from the End of the World is a collection of short stories set in the world of The Rising, examining the history of the Siqqusim, the arrival of the first zombie, the fall of mankind, and the terrifying events that occur after City of the Dead's conclusion.

All Marcus Drake wanted was a nice, quiet vacation with his best friend, Solomon Keys, and his girlfriend, Iaka Kazumi. He figured two weeks on Pleasure Planet Four would be perfect. But things never seem to work out the way Marcus plans. They’ve barely settled in when Solomon gets kidnapped.

Imagine being able to easily control your impulses so they no longer run your life. Imagine being able to persevere and go beyond your limits whenever you need to, exceeding your expectations and those of others. Imagine being able to take action according to your intentions and convictions so that you routinely achieve your goals.

Jim Bauer is shocked when he inherits a large sum of money and a historic mansion. The mysterious gift comes with a stipulation, however; he must use the funds to restore Mansfeld Manor to its original condition. What Jim doesn’t know is that this home has a terrible history. As he works to restore the manor, he begins to learn the terrifying secrets of its past. He discovers tales of missing persons, rumors of occult rituals, and sightings of a ghostly wolf on the grounds.

On the night of a long-awaited comet sighting, Erich, a university student, comes back from the dead. Making a miraculous recovery after a horrific car accident, he quickly returns to his musical studies and seems to have a new zest for life. Though he mingles with his fellow students and dedicates himself to his work, those close to him can't help but notice something is wrong. Very wrong. Erich isn't himself anymore. His personality has changed radically, and where he was once a middling musician, he's suddenly and unaccountably developed a virtuosic talent....