Alex Perry is doing something unusual: he's a young man building a women's health-led underwear brand, and talking openly about menopause, mastectomy recovery and vulval health while he does it.

In this conversation, Emma and Alex explore:

• How his company, Alexander Clementine pivoted from a sustainable fashion focus into women's health after customer reviews and his own mum's breast cancer journey revealed an unmet need
• Why use seaweed (and specifically Icelandic seaweed harvested every four years) to make a fabric naturally antibacterial, anti-odour, temperature-regulating, moisture-wicking, hypoallergenic and rich in antioxidants
• The environmental case against synthetic underwear, and why fibres made from petrochemicals are particularly concerning in a menopause context (carcinogens, hormone disruptors, trapped heat and moisture)
• "Menopause-washing" — how to read the label and spot brands cashing in without using fabrics that actually help
• How the underwear helps with external-facing symptoms of menopause — hot flushes, heightened sensitivity, dry and itchy skin, vulval discomfort — and where it fits in breast cancer recovery (two-to-four weeks post-surgery, not as an immediate post-surgical compression bra)
• Why Alex believes men need to be part of the menopause conversation — and the response he's had from men his own age (spoiler: most know nothing about it)

• Alexander Clementine website: alexanderclementine.com
• Instagram: @alexanderclementine (search Alexander Clementine)
• Check out my earlier conversation with Jo and Rob, authors of Burning Up, Frozen Out — a book aimed at men with frameworks for having menopause conversations: https://www.thetripleshift.org/podcast/burning-up-frozen-out

Note: Alex kindly gifted me a sample crop bra to try ahead of recording — there's no paid sponsorship, and as regular listeners know, I rarely talk about products on the podcast unless I've used them myself.

To find out more about ways to work with me please check out www.thetripleshift.org/starthere

You'll find me on Substack too https://middlingalong.substack.com/

Retirement was introduced in the UK in 1948, when life expectancy was 66. It was designed to support people for about a year. So why are we still treating 65 as the cliff edge — and accepting a model that funnels women out of the workforce just as their crystallised intelligence peaks?

This week I'm joined by Lucy Standing, founder of Brave Starts, co-author of Age Against the Machine: New Rules for Working in an Ageist World, Telegraph careers columnist, and contributor to OECD policy on older workers. Lucy is sharp, evidence-led, and refreshingly impatient with the way the labour market wastes people in their 50s and 60s.

We talk about:

• Why retirement as we know it is a 1940s solution being applied to a problem that no longer exists

• The difference between fluid intelligence (peaks at 19) and crystallised intelligence (peaks in your late 40s and 50s) — and why most hiring still measures the wrong one

• The OECD-backed Generation study where 89% of older hires performed at or above expectations, against hiring managers' predictions

• Why "I want to do something more purposeful" is the dominant driver for workers over 50 — and money ranks sixth

• Why the jobs board model is broken if you're trying to pivot, and what to do instead (hint: stop hitting "easy apply")

• The would-be hotelier who almost spent his life savings on a Lake District boutique — and the two days that saved him

• Why we'll happily pay £30k for a degree but balk at paying for two days of practical experience in the field we're considering

• The 82-year-old woman whose letter changed how Lucy thinks about loneliness, work, and contribution

If you've ever felt invisible in the job market after 50, been told you're "overqualified," or watched a brilliant friend get screened out by an applicant tracking system, this one's for you.

Links:

• Age Against the Machine: New Rules for Working in an Ageist World — by Lucy Standing, Maggie Evans and Martin Hyde, out now in paperback [https://www.waterstones.com/book/age-against-the-machine/lucy-standing/martin-hyde/9783111706894]

• Brave Starts: bravestarts.com

• Lucy on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lucystanding/

You can find me, and the full podcast archive over at www.thetripleshift.org/starthere

Don't forget to subscribe to my Substack too: https://middlingalong.substack.com/

This time I’m joined by Joe Warner and Rob Kemp, authors of the new book Burning Up, Frozen Out: What Every Man Needs to Know About the Menopause (But No One Told You) – written specifically to help men understand and support their partners through perimenopause and menopause. Joe and Rob share why they wrote the book, the communication tools that can transform midlife relationships, why men don’t need to “fix” anything, and how a little knowledge goes a very long way.

Joe Warner is an award-winning journalist and bestselling author, and former editorial director of Men’s Fitness magazine. He has spent more than two decades working across print, digital and broadcast media, writing extensively about men’s and women’s health, fitness and wellbeing.

Rob Kemp is a freelance journalist and author of seven non-fiction books, including the Amazon-bestselling The Expectant Dad’s Survival Guide, The New Dad’s Survival Guide and The Good Guys: 50 Heroes Who Changed the World with Kindness. He has written about men’s health, parenting and sports for more than 30 years.

• Why Joe and Rob wrote Burning Up, Frozen Out
• The parallels Rob noticed between supporting a partner through pregnancy and supporting a partner through perimenopause
• Why men often default to “fixer” mode – and the relief that comes from learning they don’t have to fix anything
• Moving from a solutions mindset to a support mindset
• The “midlife logistics company” problem: how couples stop talking to each other and start just managing schedules
• The Midlife MOT – a weekly check-in tool for couples to score how they’re feeling physically and mentally, and use it as a springboard for conversation
• The Traffic Light List – a green/amber/red exercise to uncover what your partner loves, tolerates and can’t stand (including in the bedroom)
• Active listening vs jumping into solutions: “Do you want help, a hug, or to be heard?”
• How men can be the “Sherlock Holmes” who spots perimenopause symptoms before their partner does
• The disconnect around sex and intimacy in midlife: why men often seek connection through sex, while women need connection before sex
• Spontaneous vs responsive desire, and the idea of the “sizzle” – giving intimacy time to build
• Lowered tolerance in perimenopause: why “she’s changed” is the wrong framing
• Being a co-advocate at GP appointments and the chapter on “Dealing with the Doctor”
• Rob’s biggest surprise: how poorly the medical profession has served women presenting with menopause symptoms
• Joe’s biggest surprise: how empowered he felt once he had the knowledge to actually help

1. You don’t have to fix it. Shifting from a solutions mindset to a support mindset is the single most powerful change a man can make.
2. A little education goes a long way. Understanding what’s actually happening hormonally helps men take symptoms seriously, respond with empathy, and spot what’s going on – sometimes before their partner does.
3. Communication is a skill, not a talent. It needs practice, just like anything else. The book provides a menu of practical tools and phrases you can pick and choose from.
4. Make time sacred. A weekly coffee, a walk, a Midlife MOT check-in – carving out regular, low-pressure time to talk is the single habit that every expert Jo and Rob spoke to swore by.
5. You’re not alone. Isolation makes everything harder. This is something couples go through together, and asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

“Once they read in the book that their job isn’t to fix anything, you can almost see the weight of the world lift off their shoulders.”

– Joe Warner

“All I said to her was, can I make you a cup of tea? That’s all I had.”

– Rob Kemp

• Burning Up, Frozen Out: https://www.johnmurraypress.co.uk/titles/joe-warner/burning-up-frozen-out/9781399826655/
• com – includes a free download of Chapter 4 (on men and the midlife crisis) and the Midlife MOT tool
• Also mentioned: Listen by Dr Kathryn Mannix; Rebel Bodies by Sarah Graham

If you think your partner could benefit from this conversation, send them a link to this episode and to the book. And if you’ve read Burning Up, Frozen Out, Joe and Rob would love to hear from you – get in touch via burningupfrozenout.com.

If you'd like to find out more about my work, or how to work with me, please visit www.thetripleshift.org/starthere