Showing results by narrator "Rachel Lanning" in All Categories

Behind many of our problems lies an often ignored factor: we don’t like ourselves very much. We are sufferers of self-hatred. We tell ourselves the meanest things. It’s because of self-hatred that we tend to neglect our potential at work and get entangled in unfulfilling relationships, that we lack confidence in our social lives and suffer from anxiety, despair and imposter syndrome.

Few life skills are as neglected, yet as important, as the ability to remain calm. Our very worst decisions and interactions are almost invariably the result of a loss of calm - and a descent into anxiety and agitation. Surprisingly, but very fortunately, our power to remain calm can be rehearsed and improved. We don’t have to stay where we are now: our responses to everyday challenges can dramatically alter. This is a book that patiently unpacks the causes of our greatest stresses and gives us a succession of arguments with which to defend ourselves against panic and fury.

The modern world can be a complicated, frenzied, and noisy place, filled with too many options, products, ideas and opinions. That explains why what many of us long for is simplicity: a life that can be more pared down, peaceful, and focused on the essentials. But finding simplicity is not always easy; it isn’t just a case of emptying out our closets or trimming back commitments in our diaries. True simplicity requires that we understand the roots of our distractions – and develop a canny respect for the stubborn reasons why things can grow complex and overwhelming.

This is a guide to anxiety: why we feel it, how we experience it when it strikes, and what we can do when we come under its influence. Across a series of essays that look at the subject from a number of angles, the tone is helpful, compassionate, and in the best sense, practical.

The second book in The School of Life's 'Secrets' series, offering lessons on the emotional skills necessary to build and maintain friendships.

It can sometimes seem a mystery why some couples stay together and thrive—while many more split up or drag on scratchily. While we might think happy love is left to chance, there are some identifiable secrets that underpin good relationships that we can learn and put into practice. The first title of a new series, The Secrets of Successful Relationships draws upon the expertise of The School of Life therapists to teach us the key ingredients of contented love.

We may spend years mastering the external world–acquiring degrees, advancing careers, building families–without ever turning inwards to make sense of the person orchestrating it all: ourselves. This book is a guide to the elusive, essential task of self-knowledge. With clarity, gentleness and depth, it explores why we are often mysteries to ourselves, how our childhoods quietly script our behaviors and why seemingly trivial experiences–an abrupt word, a strange dream, a lingering mood–can hold the keys to profound insight.

From Trauma to Healing is a practical guide to breaking free of these traumas and finding hope for the future. In four chapters, Causes of Trauma, Symptoms of Trauma, Relocating Trauma, and Processing Trauma, we learn what trauma is, how it can affect us for decades, and how we can liberate ourselves from it in a healthy way.

How to Survive the Modern World is the ultimate guide to navigating our unusual times. It identifies a range of themes that present acute challenges to our mental wellbeing. The book tackles our relationship to the news media, our ideas of love and sex, our assumptions about money and our careers, our attitudes to animals and the natural world, our admiration for science and technology, our belief in individualism and secularism–and our suspicion of quiet and solitude.

A book to offer clarity and guidance when facing the difficult decision of whether your relationship has a future. Whether we should stay in or leave a relationship is one of the most consequential and painful decisions we are ever likely to confront.

We exhaust ourselves and the planet in the search for very large pleasures, while all around us lies a wealth of small pleasures, which—if we only pay more attention—can bring us solace and joy on a daily basis. This is a guidebook to life's small pleasures: everything from the distinct delight of holding a child's hand to the joy of watching the evening sky. It's an intriguing, evocative collection that will heighten our senses and return us to the world with newfound excitement and enthusiasm.

This is a hopeful, consoling, gentle book about failure. Our societies talk a lot about success, but the reality is that no one gets through life without failing–in small and usually also in large ways. Sometimes our failures are very obvious, at other times, we feel we have to conceal them out of shame. This book encourages us to accept the role that failure plays for all of us and to feel compassion for ourselves for the messes we can’t help but make as we go through our lives.

This book presents a range of areas in which we can seek the meaning of life, including love, family, friendship, work, self-knowledge and nature. We discover why some things feel meaningful and others don't, and learn how to introduce more meaning into our daily lives.

The idea that work might be fulfilling rather than just necessary is a recent invention. These days, in prosperous areas of the world, we don't only expect to get paid, we also expect to find meaning and satisfaction. It's a big ask and explains why so many people have an identity crisis in their work lives. A Job To Love is designed to help us better understand ourselves in order to find a job that is right for us. It explores the myths, traps and confusions that get in our way, and shows us how to develop new, effective attitudes and habits.

Much of today's media tells us to be thinner, richer, and more successful. This book tells us how to be nicer. Niceness may not have the immediate allure of money or fame, but we can all benefit from practical advice on how to be more patient, better at listening, less irritable, and less defensive. This is a guidebook to the uncharted landscape of niceness, gently exploring the key themes of this often overlooked quality.

Following on from the bestselling How to Overcome Your Childhood, Getting Over Your Parents is a practical guide on how to navigate the complex legacies left to us by our parents, and how to parent ourselves.

A compassionate guide to normalizing mental illness and achieving emotional wellbeing. This is a guide to coping with a wide variety of mental unwellness, from the very mild to the severe. It explains how and why we become mentally ill, how we can explain our experiences to friends and family, and how we can reframe our view of ourselves and our future in order to thrive.

Modern life is full of minor but acute dilemmas: we get stuck at a gathering with someone unusually boring and wonder how to move on without causing offence; in the course of introducing one friend to another, we realise that we have forgotten one of the party’s names; we run into an ex while on an early date with a new partner; we spill red wine across a host’s sofa...

This is a book that celebrates the most neglected but valuable emotion we can feel: melancholy. Melancholy isn’t depression, rage, or bitterness. It’s a serene, wise, and kindly response to the difficulties of being alive. It helps us navigate a wise and rational middle ground between extreme despair and naïve optimism. But melancholy is a well-kept secret. It isn't celebrated or recommended. It remains relatively unexplored in a hyper-competitive, noisy, frantic age.

Finding and choosing a partner is one of the most consequential decisions we will ever make. This guide explains everything from why we have "types" and how our early lives inform our romantic decisions as adults. It sheds light on harmful and repetitive patterns and provides insight on how to break them. Drawing on in-depth analysis, How to Find Love explains our instinct for romantic self-sabotage and provides a crucial set of ideas to help us make safer, more imaginative and more effective choices in love.